Do you ever just want to fall to the floor and cry like you were 5 years old again?
Discouragement can be a big hurdle in ministry. So much effort and energy is put into services, projects, lessons, etc. and there is sometimes little to show for it. Sometimes I want to scream my frustrations to the world, but then I restrain myself to keep up appearances. I understand the responsibility of being professional and mature. I want people's respect. I don't want to discourage others or make them think I'm giving up.
But at the same time, I want to be real. I long for encouragement. Maybe even a miracle.
So, do I express myself or bottle it up? The answer seems obvious, but it's not as easy as it sounds. I feel like much damage would be done if I really pour out my thoughts. Yet, I've learned from past experience that building up inner pressure leads to ruptures. That's also unhealthy.
What's a girl to do? I suppose I can type a vague blog, get a good night's sleep, and hope the new day offer's new hope.
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